compromise?

com·pro·mise ( P ) Pronunciation Key (kmpr-mz)n. A settlement of differences in which each side makes concessions. The result of such a settlement. Something that combines qualities or elements of different things: The incongruous design is a compromise between high tech and early American. A concession to something detrimental or pejorative: a compromise of morality. isnt that the basis of any relationship? i cant remember the last time i saw a compromise. taurra says everything is a power struggle...and it is. and ofcourse she always gets her way too. I CANT REMEMBER THE LAST TIME WE DID SOMETHING I WANTED TO DO. i suppose from now on i should just give up arguing, or voicing my opinion on what we should do. we do what she wants to do, when she wants to do it. i wanted to go visit my parents today, and yesterday she said she would. when i said something about it today, she said no, she wasnt goign to go. the only reason i wanted to go is so she could spend some time with my folks. its important to me that the person i'm dating is atleast comfortable around my parents, and my parents are aroudn them. and as of right now, that isnt the case. i NEED for her to spend some time with my parents. i feel really weird in the situation that i'm in now, and i need for it to be ok, but she isnt letting that happen. i think its mostly 'cause she knows i cant leave, i love her too much. i wonder if she consciously takes advantage of that. of how i cant tell her "no", or cant really do anything that might make her sad. i hope she isnt doing it on purpose...but she IS doing it. on the brighter side..she is goign to lobby to get me to go to the east coast with her. i've never been east. the furthest east i've ever been was vegas :-/

I just wanted to ...

I just wanted to leave David a note...Suprise! I just wanted you to know I love you more than anything. I know we power struggle...but its always me getting upset. Not you. And I'm sorry for that. I love you... your eyes, your noseys and the hole in your pants that you wear anyway :).Forgives me?Love, T

please...

please please please stop with all the fucking surveys. thats all my friends list is now. jesus. (yes...i know i just filled one out too. but it was only one!!! i swear!)

bluefem44 10 ...

bluefem44 10 Bands You've Seen Live:1. MSI2. White Zombie (not rob..white)3. Manson4. Gravity Kills5. Pantera6. Toadies7. Primus8. Weezer9. Static X10. (hed) P.E.09 Things You're Looking Forward To1. playoffs...nba2. getting a job3. sleep4. march madness5. meh i dont knwo that i've got any more6. 7. 8. 9. 08 Things You Wear Daily1. socks2. black slacks3. bootshoes4. white undershirt5. nipple rings6. black7. long sleeve shirt (tis the season)8. taurra07 Things That Annoy You1. Ignorance2. being shrugged off 3. other drivers4. hypocrisy5. cori's kittie peeing on things6. fighting over stupid shit7. taurra's exboyfriends.06 Things You Touch Every Day1. taurra2. soap3. my cellphone4. monkeys5. remote control6. other peoples hearts (or something?)05 Things You Do Every Day 1. drive2. breathe3. try to be nicer4. wear black5. be exhausted04 People You'd Want to Spend More Time With 1. taurra (if it were possible)2. wilson (he gets sad)3. my boss ('cause i want a job)4. batman03 Movies You Could Watch Over and Over1. fifth element2. Betelgeuse3. big trouble in little china02 Of Your Favorite Songs At This Moment1. super bon bon2. theme to the sims01 Person You Could Spend the Rest of Your Life With1. taurra.

w3rd

i finially got my computer set up at taurra's house. the problem wasnt the computer. it was the router. i had to go in and set up the router myself. i've never done that before. i feel really good about it. i wish i could write more, but i'm not sure what to write yet. meh...

i'm...

i'm so sick right now :( this is the sickest i've been in probably 3 years. hey, at least i'm not throwing up. i think its 'cause all the dust and stuff in taurra's room. i've been putting off cleaning it up, hoping that she would do it herself. i dont see that happening though. i'm getting more used to being alone at taurra's house. as much time i spend there...i still feel like a guest, and outsider...and an intruder. i feel really awkward when she leaves me to go do something else...but i'm getting used to it. so i've spent the last 2 weeks there, only coming home for clothes and such. i like it, but its scary. i should take the fact that she never wants me to go as that she wants me to be there. it feels more like she doesnt want me to be other places though. (did that come through in meaning ok?) everytime taurra post about me in her live journal, she makes it seem like a burden that she cares for me. it makes me really sad. she never talks about me in an upbeat way. and its weird how she talks about kyle in her live journal. i wish she would talk about me like she talks about him...

things are odd...

i'm in a weird situation right now. details later. i'm very confused, and for once...it has nothign to do with taurra (well, she isnt the part i'm confused about). its tough being with taurra 'cause she is so great that lots of guys hit on her. a lot. some of them arent the people i would think that would be inviting her out to do stuff, which makes it even more tough. also, i hate sleeping on taurra's bed. gives me backaches. she needs a new matress. now.